Unbelievable
by MAR2811
Summary: Post 5X10 - He gets near the plane – unnoticed – and sees Granger alone. He's pacing back and forth and looking nervously to his watch and to his phone… but he's alone. Deeks almost freaks out, thinking about all the possible reasons for her absence.


_First, this is my second fic ever, and the first one in english. If I was scared when I published the first story, now I'm terrified. I apologise in advance for all my mistakes, hoping you can forgive me in the spirit of the season._

_Second, I forgot something very important in my first story, so I'll just write it twice now: NCIS and its characters do not belong to me, I do not own NCIS or its characters._

_And thirdly... third... please enjoy (if you can) "**Unbelievable**"._

* * *

It was absolutely unbelievable how he could go from the biggest happiness to the deepest despair. She's been reassigned. To where… he has no idea; for how long… he (deeply) wishes he knew… Never ever was something easy in his life, he always had to go through hills and valleys, dark tunnels and high mountains, through rain, strong winds, storms, tornadoes ... oooh! Sh t! He is so damn tired. He's _so_ tired…

He was a child with no right to a childhood, a little boy with no right to Christmas nights, a lawyer with no right to achievement, a cop with no right to share and then… then he found his first real family… not that _that_ was always easy, but he found them. Well, the truth is that she introduced them, and now, she chooses to do _this_. He got used to trust "Hetty's ways", actually she was the first one he trusted, but this… this he can't explain.

It is unbelievable how he can go from the deepest despair to the most overwhelming anger. He got her, he just got her and now… he lost her. Granger always had a way of interfering with them. He was the one who created the "Monica fiasco", for God sake; he couldn't care less with the agents' lives; there's nothing he cares more than the job and… oooh f ck! Granger's the one who will be watching her back.

He can't believe how fast he goes from the most overwhelming anger to the most agonizing fear. Granger hasn't been in the field regularly for the past years, he's an "office rat" and the worst part is that he always… always… chooses the mission first and lives second. And to top it all, she's always… always… reckless, unbelievingly reckless. And he doesn't know where she is, for how long and what this mission is about. And then, he starts thinking about the possibility of this mission including a male version of Monica and … oooh boy! He's jealous, incredibly green-eyed!

Guilt… this is the feeling he experiences next. They were fine, he remembers, but really fine, not "their fine", before Monica. And then, because he lied to her – so many times – he hurt her. He remembers the night after the "I'm good, you're good" talk. He couldn't sleep, he thought about all the times he called her princess, honey, hun-bun or Fern, how he wanted to call her "love" and how she should be thinking that that was just a game… his game. He remembers he got up from bed – it was 3 a.m. -, got dressed as fast as he could, picked up his keys and drove to her house. Then he stood at her doorstep and didn't have it in himself to knock. He knows how many steps backwards that story represented… just as many as the "I've been fired" lie. "How could he love and lie like this?", he thinks.

Then he is frustrated, frustrated he can't go back in time and change it all. He thought he was patient with her, that he had walked all the way to the middle of the bridge and even past that point, but the truth is he also had his walls up and he too, made some steps backwards… And his girl – his badass girl – was really just a girl, a girl expecting to be found. «_Maybe I was hoping one day, he'd come looking for me._», she had said.

And finally he just thinks about how unbelievingly fool he is being, because he shouldn't be thinking about Hetty or Granger, Monica or Sabatino (yeah, when he pictured the male version of Monica, he just saw Sabatino's face, damn him) or about what he hadn't done, he should be thinking about what he should do _now_.

He starts running out of OPS and starts calling Eric. And then he's smiling. He didn't think he would be able to smile before getting to her, but Eric doesn't answer the phone saying "Good night" or "watcha doin?", he just tells him "the GPS coordinates are…" and then gives him the magic numbers. He thinks that, at least, he's right to believe he found his first real family.

* * *

She is unbelievingly furious, she is furious with Hetty and Granger, she is furious with Callen and Sam – she thinks they should have done more. They should have done something. But then again, she's Kensi Blye and Kensi Blye doesn't really need help; if there was a way, she would have found it. Then again, this is her job and she's a professional.

This is her job and she can't believe how she was able to get out of the car, leaving Sam and Callen behind, start running through the street, firing her gun, disrespecting all protocol, maybe creating danger to the passers-by… oooh! Damn… Hetty is right and she's wrong, unbelievingly wrong.

She punched him for so much less.

She looked Sam in the eyes, noting he was begging her to stay calm, to not ruin it, to not make the mistakes maybe he once did, expecting her to say "clear", but she was only able to give him a very small – almost unrecognisable – nod. Well, a faux nod. And then, she couldn't bare the ache in her chest, she couldn't bare the space, the smell, the air in the backseat of that car. She had to run… they had no info from the inside of that building but her heart had all the info she needed. She just had to go. And she was right, unbelievingly right. Maybe Hetty's wrong, maybe this new found instinct can make their partnership better, maybe he didn't take the shot because he had a feeling he would miss it, and maybe he would. So it was a good thing he chose not to do it.

And she punched him… oh God!

And she really punched him this time. She had never done it with all the strength she's capable of – she's a federal agent, c' mon – she knew it, he knew it. But not today. Today she used all her strength, she felt as if he was betraying her, he wasn't trying as hard as he should, he was ruining their chances, he was giving up on them, as if "them" was not really important for him, as if it had all just been a game… his game… as if he was leaving…

But no, he was just feeling his instinct, cause he was right and she was wrong. She needed too much time to trust this feeling, this instinct, he's always faster. "_Took you long enough_.", he had said. And he was right.

And she was unbelievingly wrong to be following words straight away. Why is she driving home to pack her things and intending to go from home to the plane directly? She can pack quickly or pack less clothes – who needs clothes anyway, she doesn't even know where she's going. She can get traffic … or she could… and then she would be late. She'll just make a quick stop in a very special place. And she's so damn wrong doing this, but she's so right.

* * *

He is driving as fast as he can, but the traffic is unbelievingly slow. And he starts getting angry with Hetty again, because if he had his motorcycle, he would have more chances to get to her on time. On the other hand, if he had his motorcycle, and with "their" fate, he would probably be losing fuel and he would stop in the middle of the way and… oooh! Shenanigans! Give it to him to have a LAPD bike patrol with an agent knocking on his window, when he stops in a line. He gets the window glass down and the agent is taking off his helmet and Deeks starts smiling. He hadn't expect to find a friend there… he hadn't expect to find family, but there he was, smiling and saying "Wanna trade detective?".

Of course he wants to trade Sam.

He takes the motorcycle and the helmet (he doesn't want to get her mad… I mean, angry…) and drives off. Then he gets near the entrance of the small private airport Eric indicated and sees a guard. He breathes deeply and remembers he's used to the hills and valleys, dark tunnels and high mountains, rain, strong winds, storms and tornadoes. He just needs to find a way around this obstacle, but then he gives a second glance to the guard and smiles. (Yeah, you're not wrong, reader, you're right…)

It's Callen.

He gets near the plane – unnoticed – and sees Granger alone. He's pacing back and forth and looking nervously to his watch and to his phone… but he's alone. Deeks almost freaks out, thinking about all the possible reasons for her absence. And then, in the moment he picks up his phone to call her, his phone starts ringing. Nell's sweet voice tells him she went to his place, but she's driving to the airport now and he thinks she's really a young Hetty – she always knows.

It is unbelievable how quickly the profound ache in his whole body fades. She looks astonishingly beautiful dressed with _that_. She doesn't see him, and walks in the direction of the small plane looking around, as if she was looking for something… for someone.

And then – suddenly – she sees him and runs to him and hugs him… _crying_. Kensi Blye is crying and that's unbelievable. And she's whispering something he doesn't understand at first but then recognises as apologies. She's sorry she punched him… oooh! so sorry! And she's sorry it took her so long… She's unbelievingly sorry it took her so long.

And then he's hugging her – it's a strong sweet embrace – and he's pressing his feet to the ground as if he wanted to create roots for them both. And he's sorry he can't do something… he can't do more… he can't find a way.

But then she says he found her and that's all she wanted, all she ever wanted.

He calls her princess and baby girl and Fern and she knows he's calling her "love". And he kisses her and she kisses him back … before leaving, again.

He'll be patient and he'll wait, he won't leave, he won't ever leave. It took her long enough but now she's sure. She's badass Blye and she'll find a way, a way to come back.

He gets home and finds her shirt on his couch. There's a note too.

"Don't worry Max.

I'll be back.

PS: I took one of your shirts, thanks."


End file.
